I wrote this a couple days before Zoey was born and I feel like I should have published it. Just to remember.
Still no sign of our little bug. Maybe on Groundhog Day?
I'm longing to meet her, and more than just that I'm aching to make sure everything is okay and all is well and healthy.
Pregnancy is such an odd waiting game of trust and rest in knowing only God knows the outcome. It has stretched my faith and trust in ways I don't think I could have been stretched if I didn't get to experience this magic.
I've been thinking all month of a word for this year. I've gone around and around so much and couldn't seem to think of one.
John & I were brainstorming and after seeing how last years word was nothing to mess with, (boy did I learn how to adjust. In some awesome/difficult ways) I feel like this year...2012, I need to find the rhythm that He wants to set my feet to. The rhythm I tend to avoid because life gets busy and my pace seems better. The rhythm He has set of being a mom to two, a wife to a pastor who works so hard, a wife to a writer who loves his outlet and needs it. The rhythm of family time, rest time, getaway solo time, late night nursings and investing and getting to know women from church & outside of church. To continue to discover His rhythm for ministry and where He wants me to serve. And waiting on His voice and His timing.
The new rhythm of a family of four sometimes scares me. Of trying to balance quality time with John with Jack's love and enthusiasm for life and Zoey's new life. I think, like most people, changing our rhythm and pace can be difficult. Some people thrive. John and I tend to be a little reluctant at times, especially when we weren't expecting the change.
But man, every change in rhythm has brought growth and depth in character. It's so worth it.
I'm also hoping to learn the rhythm of health and becoming active and intentional about eating healthy, exercising regularly and learning to love it. (I'll be honest, that's the hardest part for me.)
I hope to go with the rhythm of seasons and truly enjoy them. Metaphorically speaking and the actual change in seasons. I love me some cold weather and after living in Arizona for almost nine (!!!) years, you would have thought I would be used to its relentless (albeit beautiful) sun by now. Getting there.
Hopes for much outside water play, hikes and walks around our neighborhood, trips to the zoo and beyond are in my hopeful future. Fall and winter will come again, they typically do.
There are so many things that a new year brings. So many unforeseen changes and growth. So many obstacles and moments of hurt and changes that we didn't expect. But I do think He alone can bring the change we long for and He is so faithful to do that.