life

Our Mom's group recently started reading this book together. It is so good, so real and vulnerable. We've been having this mom's group for almost a year and we went deep during those often-interrupted 45 minutes and it was good.

On another note, the other night during our homegroup Jack decided to sit next to John and mimic everything he was saying--as he was saying it. It was hilarious. It took a lot of convincing to distract Jack and he wasn't really being cheeky. He was genuinely trying to be like daddy, haha. It was kind of like this skit.

Here is Zoey trying to hold two babies at once. 

Birdie ate asparagus and loved it. She loves her food. I can see where she gets that from.

Who is this big boy in Christmas pajamas? He has grown up much too fast.

Again, Zoey with the asparagus. Haha.

They really recently started enjoying baths together and although the older one still likes to take up most of the bath tub with his cars and trucks, little sister has begun to enjoy playing with the toys and splashing in the water too.

I've kind of got a rhythm down where I wash both of their hair and bodies as quick as possible and let them play for a bit. It really is just as easy to wash two as it is to wash one.

This girl is really starting to develop her personality. It's already so clear that she likes to have fun. She has a deep belly laugh and is incredible ticklish. Her first "word" if you will is "tickle-tickle-tickle" as she tickles her little tummy and asks you to. I love this about her. She also loves to hug baby dolls and real babies and is always saying "Yeha" when she sees a baby.

Her heart is so full of joy and carefree happiness. I can not wait to see the kind of woman she develops and grows into. What a journey! This tiny little person who will one day and grow and be her own woman. I can hardly believe it.

I can also hardly believe that Zoeybird is almost done nursing. It's kind of sad, but it's kind of time. I love those moments and if I let myself think about it too long I start to feel sad and regret having John always put her down. I am not holding my breath though because she was up quite a bit last night. But without nursing during the day there's a whole lot of nothing there for her to eat, so I think she's a little bummed too.

It's good, it's healthy, it's time. We're going to San Francisco in a couple of weeks (just the two of us) and hope to have her fully weaned by then. Sort of bittersweet, but worth it.

Those moments were so sweet and precious. Nursing isn't my favorite part of mothering, but the release of those happy hormones sure is awesome. I do miss that. I will always miss that. (is that selfish?)

little Zoey after being nursed to sleep. Those moments were so sweet.

miscellany monday

Breastfeeding Jack has come to an end.

...And with it has brought 5am wake up calls 

and some serious missing of the sweet bond (more so me than Jack, I think) and the oxytocin that is released when feeding. It's been kind of a wild ride noticing the difference in when I was nursing to lately when I haven't been. I feel so different and am more often...sad. It's so strange. I'm thankful Jack weened on his own and he seems to be taking it very well, but I never ever expected that I would the one who kind of misses it. If anyone had asked me a year ago if I would continue to nurse this long I would probably have told you, "yeah, I just don't think I can do it for that long." I just didn't think I would be a mom who loves breastfeeding. I mean, in the beginning it was just an inexpensive, hassle-free way to take care of our boy.

But after figuring out how to nurse (by God's grace) + Jack's latch issues + cutting out dairy and soy to see if it would improve his bowel issues + realizing nursing on demand really is the best way to go + loving it= a hard thing to let go. I have a hard time letting most good things go and nursing is added to that list. Such sweet, precious time.

That being said, this 5am wake up call has both John and I in quirky moods. Arizona doesn't have a time change (pretty crazy, huh?) and so it seems while everyone else have turned their clocks back an hour and Arizona is supposed to stay the same, Jack just jumped on the band wagon. Didn't he get the memo? Also, my iphone thinks we live in a state that has daylight savings too and I can't seem to figure out how to fix it (ie, I haven't tried to figure out how to change it.) I'm just too tired?

Last night John and I spent most of the evening watching some SNL favs. Some of the best?

 

I may or may not be using SNL to replace the oxytocin I am missin' since I stopped breastfeeding. Either way, it had me laughing for hours.

Today the leaves are falling, the clouds are heavy and the wind is making the trees dance. I think a long walk is in order. Any walking-music recommendations?