Christmas was different this year. Our first year John was able to sit with us during the christmas eve service, the first year in a long time that we didn't see sight of snow, the first Christmas in a new state, new place, new home.
It was magical.
Of course there was the sting of loss traditions, but there was the blossoming of so many new.
And this weather has captivated me. It's been raining mostly, but occasionally sunny. It's made up for the lack of snow and things have turned green again.
Little Zoey wanted nothing more than to be in the play with her big brother. One day soon, my little love.
I tried my best to carry on the tradition of making Christmas cookies. Jack, my little task oriented kids loved it. I just try to go with the mess, but….yeah.
Jack's performance in the Christmas play. He loved it!
Christmas morning waiting on the steps. These two.
As a new year is upon me I feel ready to find bravery. To just go with it. I am a natural worrier/fear wrangler/overthinker. But this year I want to take steps towards risks and rather than give in to the fear of failure I want to see the risk as a goal, a challenge. Something that can be achieved. And if not, then at least I know I tried. When I feel that feeling of "there's no way I can do this without failing." I want to push myself a little further because those feelings are sign that I'm living, truly living and embracing the scary. 'cause real life is scary. And grown up life is scary. I'm just being real.
That's not a natural thing for me, to take risk. I have always rather avoided risk. But I'm beginning to think that risk is really worth it.